bagel

A torus you can eat that’s not a donut!

Bagels are perfect!

Posted by charles thiesen on November 21, 2007

95 Responses to “Bagels are perfect!”

  1. Woooie! You are here!

    Nice post. I like bagels too. I wasn’t ever sure why. Now that I know they’re perfect, I see.

  2. thelittlefluffycat said

    Yes, they are. Especially with nutella.

  3. jojovtx1800 said

    Wow, the simplicity of this is genious, you are a god.

  4. Wanda Rizzuto said

    Oh my poor blogroll!

  5. cthiesen said

    Hey guys, I’d visit you or something, but I don’t have a clue how to go about it. See you on the flip side.

  6. thirdculturemom said

    Yes, some of them. Others are less than perfect.

    Any idea who I am? I created this account a few days ago, but I haven’t done anything else yet.

  7. cthiesen said

    Third Culture Mom. Hmmm. Third Culture? Mom? Give me another hint.

  8. thirdculturemom said

    It doesn’t look like you need another hint. :-)

    I don’t know what I’ll be doing here yet, but I think this time I’ll be anonymous. So you can just call me TCM or something.

  9. cthiesen said

    Mums the word. I’m only here because BONGO begged me. It’s kind of funny to talk to someone (like you) in email, on Ning, on Gather, and here. My head spins. (Of course I also just had a large glass of sherry.)

  10. thirdculturemom said

    The secret is only for the outside world, of course, not for the G gang. I’ll put a notice up there once I figure out what to do here.

  11. Begged you? I just told you it is fun being here. Good grief.

    I am glad you’re here though. It will be more fun for me.

  12. kmcdade said

    OK, you are here, now come and find me!

  13. That’s what we authors call “hyperbole.” It’s a legitimate rhetorical device. (Sometimes also known as “lying.”)

  14. Oh. Hey. You can delete comments here so as to remove accidental leaving of names and the like. Just go to “My Comments” click delete and POOF! they’re gone.

    I guess you’re used to that.

    Also, you can edit them if you want to keep the thread. You could put “**** [correct guess]” or something like that if you wanted.

  15. shadodottir said

    Well, howdy! I’m here — Shadodottir, who was a hedgehog in a previous life. My sons love bagels, so I’ll let them know god approves.

  16. If You created the world in x number of days, did You take a special day to create the bagel?

    I would think it required its own day, but perhaps Your powers are greater than my tiny mind can encompass.

  17. Hey David,

    I’m not a god on WordPressm, at least not yet, but I have it on good authority that the bagel took nearly a week.

  18. pandemonic said

    At the risk of sounding like the only naysayer (which I will be, of course), bagels are NOT perfect. Today’s bagel is three times the size of a bagel twenty years ago. If they were smaller, THEN they would be perfect.

    :-)

  19. Where do you get your bagles? The bagels I buy are exactly the same size as the bagels I grew up with 50 years ago.

  20. Ivy said

    Garlic bagel (toasted), veggie cream cheese (light), and cucumbers (thinly sliced). Mmm.

  21. Ivy said

    Hey! You’re here!

    Good to see you.

  22. Not bad, but I believe that anything but a plain bagel is just gilding the lily. I don’t feel that way about toppings, though. Cream cheese, lox, onions, cukes, food of the gods.

  23. How did you know I was here before I posted my rebuttal? (I’m not here anymore. I’m off to bed. But good to see you, too.)

  24. pandemonic said

    Charles, sorry I am late returning. I had an accident. To answer your question, the bagels around here are so big, they are obscene. About the diameter of a medium pancake. We can use them to replace the wheel on the wheelbarrow.

  25. tigereye said

    Bagels with cream cheese and brown sugar — mmm…

    Hi Charles! I’m known elsewhere as Sunflowercat, among other things…

  26. Tigereye suits.

  27. tigereye said

    Thanks! It’s turning into a less prickly personality than I have at some other places.

  28. and peanut butter. And lox and a schmear, with capers and lettuce and tomato…*drool*

  29. I just put on another pound. Sigh.

    I eat half a plain bagel with butter every day for breakfast. This is what makes me what I am. Whatever that is. Without the bagel I’d be a shadow of myself. Without the Barry’s tea with milk and sugar I drink with it I’d be a wreck of a man.

  30. Stevo said

    Are you the only God on WordPress? I believe so.

  31. Here’s a new comment, to see if the link process worked. Bagels are popular in our household, but we don’t all agree on which type is best. I vote for garlic.

  32. Does my link work yet?

  33. Does my link work yet?

  34. Ah, you mean your link. Yes, it works. Sorry.

  35. kmcdade said

    Hey! When are you going to post something? How about a bagel recipe? Or some commandments?

  36. Thou shalt not messy with bagels. They’re already perfect.

  37. Corina said

    I never heard of bagels til I got to college. We saved them from the morning then played bagel hockey at night, after the dining hall was empty. Masks, pads, the whole thing because when they get hard, they’re dangerous!

  38. Does that declaration mean you really are a deity here too?

    I mean, that’s what I assumed.

  39. bigcocky said

    Onion bagels are perfect. Blueberry, less so.

  40. Bigcocky? You’re kidding. And on top of that, onion bagels are not perfect. Onion bagels gild the lily. Plain bagels are perfect. Blueberry bagels aren’t really bagels, they’re some other despicable thing I won’t eat, like eggplant.

  41. stevo said

    There’s nothing wrong with eggplant, if don’t have to eat it.

  42. Suzy said

    How do you get this many comments here? I publish something here and have to wait 36 hours for just ONE.

    The other place feeds my need for attention so much better.

  43. I don’t have a clue ’suzy.’ I prefer the other place, too, for similar reasons.

  44. kmcdade said

    Well, apparently the key is to post NOTHING!

    You get more hits if you write about Britney Spears or The Golden Compass. That’s just like the other place, too — write about something controversial and they will come. And you know how to check your blog stats, right? Click on Dashboard, and then Blog Stats. They give you much more interesting information than they do over there, too, even if there aren’t any points.

  45. tigereye said

    K’s right. My Food Network article had “porn” as a tag, and it got the biggest response of any of my stuff so far.

  46. Hah! I clicked the wrong place. I was going to your ‘about’ box. Ooops.

  47. I still say 46 comments for a post that’s shorter than one of mine (a good trick, btw!) is not bad. :)

  48. If it was untitled, I think the number could go up by a factor of ten.

  49. heathenly said

    They’re good, I admit, but perfect?

  50. They are round and they have holes.

    Are donuts perfect too?

  51. tigereye said

    Come back, O god of bagels, come back! We miss you!

  52. Have I been somewhere?

  53. I tried going there. It didn’t work. Maybe … hmmm … no … well … I’ll be back a couple more times but the whole thing isn’t as fun anymore.

  54. Hey!
    Where are you?
    You’re not really all that omnipresent for a god.

  55. I’m on gather. I don’t spend much time here. What would I do?

  56. Ooo…that was fast. Forgive my previous impudence. My faith has been restored.

    You could write the story of what happened last night.

  57. Too much work. And why would I do it here when I can get points on gather that eventually give me gift cards for books? And get a lot more comments and conversations.

  58. As Emily Litella said,
    Oh….Nevermind.

  59. As always, the god here has a good point. I don’t get to keep my points so I’m here rather than there. Besides, I’m a heathen. Well. Sort of. I do like this one god. And bagels. They’re perfect. You kinda have to wish people would stick to the topic.

  60. tigereye said

    Come back, Shane!

  61. Tigereye!

    I’m not far away. And I’ll always respond if you call my name–or apparently someone else’s name, like Shane’s name. Or you could shine a light with a silhouette of my totem, the grasshopper, onto the clouds above Gotham City, or, better, Boston.

  62. ME said

    I changed my name and icon. I feel FREE!

  63. That’s great, ME, but I have no idea who you are or why you’re commenting here.

  64. kmcdade said

    Really? If you mouse over his name, that should tip his “hand”. Or maybe his goat. I hear goat-tipping is fun.

  65. ME said

    My apologies for the confusion. Sort of. I am ME! Think about it. ME in all caps. Who would do such a thing? And, my icon has changed everywhere.

  66. Are you there god?
    It’s me, Ivy.

    Not the “ME” me, the other me.

  67. And where else would I be? (Well, everywhere, but who’s counting.)

    Ivy,
    Seek and ye shall find
    Ask and it shall be answered
    Knock and it shall be opened
    Call and I’ll come a’runnin’

    If the good book doesn’t say that, you should find a better book.

  68. Well, thank god. (Thank you, god).

  69. Um, Thank and ye shall be, er, …. you’re-welcomed.

    You’re welcome.

  70. I was somewhat troubled that you did not know who ME is. It caused me to worry that you may not know who I am. After all the cookies and milk I left out for you…no, wait…that might have been someone else. Now I wonder why I am typing sleepy when that is rarely a good idea. Now, also, I think you were possibly playing one of those – let’s see if they remember I’m omniscient games – Then, the following tune emerged in my drowsy thoughts, “I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.” I think that about sums it up.

  71. Add and it shall be summed up. I am also the walrus.

    I admit I was a little testy about ME’s post (MY post?). Testy is the appropriate response when it seems one is being tested. Of course I know who YOU are, ME. I just chose not to reveal that knowledge. It doesn’t do to look like a know it all, even if you do, literally know it all.

  72. I’ll bet you don’t know who I am cause my pseudonym is mad clever.

  73. ME said

    I was thinking that people might address ME as YOU. That would alleviate the confusion. I’ll call myself ME and other entities will call me YOU. All caps. No italics. That’s what I’m thinking.

    Wanda made me snort. I forgot about the other place. I didn’t change there. I did forget to sign on though. Hmm. Oh well. I’ve remembered but I think I’ll have food instead.

  74. Wanda, do you have anything to do with The Money Store?

  75. Stevo said

    Charles: Are you trying to see how long you can make this comment thread?

  76. I’m just trying to get a gift card for Bruegger’s Bagels.

  77. god willing, you will.

  78. Hello?

  79. Anonymous said

    Hello.

  80. I mean, hello.

  81. Interesting trick. The nameless god.

  82. You should see what I can do with some fishies, some breading, and a deep fryer.

  83. Not blue fishes with A.D.D., I hope?

  84. No, nor leaded tuna.

  85. I assume the accompanying loaves are bagels?

  86. No, no loaves, just bread crumbs for coating. You can’t deep fry fish in bagels. They’re great, but they don’t serve every cooking need. For example, I wouldn’t cut bananas over them and pour milk and sugar on them.

  87. I went to the other place and forgot to give you points. My apologies. I think I’ll go back in another week and remember.

  88. Ina said

    Hey! I didn’t know anyone was still talking to you here! I’m here! I’m talking to you!

  89. I’ve forgotten to go back to the other place. Sickness. I mean, mine. And business. I mean being busy. Hey. Hi. There’s a greeting for you. I’ll be back another time.

  90. pandemonic said

    I came back to be #90. I like even numbers.

  91. I like odd numbers. I like even ones too. I like being on the bottom. Then again, if you look up — way up, you’ll see I like going on top too.

  92. Anonymous said

    I can’t remember who Pandemonic is, but I now remember amoeboid etc.

  93. pandemonic said

    Anonymous, I’m his girlfriend… :-)

  94. kmcdade said

    Wow, I think you have the most comments per post of any of us on WordPress!

  95. Sassquatch said

    Charles, you simply must categorize your bagel ramblings..

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